10 Mopar Guy Commandments

The Kaiser Frazer Owners Club International included these 10 car-guy commandments for their May 2011 newsletter. I shamelessly co-opted them (stole is such a nasty word) and modified them to the world of Mopars.
 
  

  1. Thou shall not store cars out-of-doors except for thy wife’s modern iron.
  2. Thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s car, nor his garage, nor his battery charger.
  3. Thou shall not love thy cars more than thy wife and children; as much, but not more.
  4. Thou shall not read thy Mopar Muscle magazine on company time, lest thy employer make it impossible to continue thy car payments.
  5. Thou shall not despise thy neighbor’s 1971 Ford Pinto, nor his 1961 Corvair, nor even his 1985 Yugo.
  6. Thou shall not allow thy daughters nor thy sons to get married during the Holy days of Chryslers at Carlisle.
  7. Thou shall not deceive thy wife into thinking that thee is taking her for a romantic Sunday drive when, indeed, thou art going out to look at another car.
  8. Thou shall not tell thy spouse the entire cost of thy latest restoration, at least not all at the same time.
  9. Thou shall not promise thy wife a new addition to the house and then use it to store cars. 
  10. Thou shall not buy thy wife a carburetor for Christmas.